


this is me trying

by dilucsrevenge



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Depression, Fluff, Multi, Polyamory, References to Depression, Romantic Fluff, This is a little sad, and i got the Urge to write a poly relationship fic with these three, its all fluff baby like marshmallow, short little drabble since i just went down jaehee's route for the first time somehow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:07:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26643484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dilucsrevenge/pseuds/dilucsrevenge
Summary: "...they told me all of my cages were mental,so i got wasted like all my potential..."in which zen and jaehee and mc enter a relationship while recovering from their childhood.
Relationships: Kang Jaehee & Main Character (Mystic Messenger), Kang Jaehee & Zen | Ryu Hyun & Main Character, Kang Jaehee/Main Character (Mystic Messenger), Kang Jaehee/Zen | Ryu Hyun, Zen | Ryu Hyun & Main Character, Zen | Ryu Hyun & Original Character(s), Zen | Ryu Hyun/Main Character, Zen | Ryu Hyun/Original Female Character(s), Zen | Ryu Hyun/Reader
Kudos: 15





	this is me trying

**Author's Note:**

> before you ask yes this is based off a taylor swift song okay i could NOT think of titles to save me and this song kept playing in my head after finishing jaehee's route and i just really had the idea of zen/jaehee/mc being in a really supportive relationship

for the longest time, happiness had become a foreign concept in your mind. it was a vague passing feeling, coming and going like the tides of the ocean. most of the time, you were only able to feel the warmth of waves at the tips of your toes and fingers, slowly retreating to fill the spaces with the everlasting coldness you were familiar with. that was until you met zen and jaehee. you were drawn to them just like you were drawn to the warmth of the ocean. being in their presence brought you something so familiar yet so new to you that you practically craved it like it was your lifeline.

and you knew you were the same for them. you were their lifeline while they didn't realize they were yours in return.

\--

"what's on your mind?" jaehee's voice rang through your ears suddenly, her fingers running through your hair that was sprawled out across her lap. 

you quickly became aware of your surroundings after you had gotten lost in thought, zen leaning against the headboard of your bed, fingers dancing across his phone screen as he answered emails from various producers. jaehee was sat next to him, her head resting on his shoulder as your head laid in her lap.

if you had been honest with jaehee, you would have said that there was a lot on your mind. you were struggling, to say the least. it was just one of those days and the reoccurring thought your brain decided to play like clockwork was the idea that zen and jaehee were better off without you. they were better off without the person who accidentally left the coffee pot with too little coffee in it, without the person who sometimes forgot to hang up their towels in the bathroom. they were better off without you in a sense that all your traces were wiped from their memory. the last christmas you spent together where you had kissed the tip of jaehee's nose to remove the trace of whipped cream after a mug of hot chocolate. the valentine's day where zen surprised the both of you with the recreation of your favorite scene from one of his plays. all those memories gone if you just weren't there. and it sounded simple to you, it sounded like a better option than needing a full day with zen and jaehee in bed pampering you in affection and reassurance when you shouldn't be there in the first place.

but you weren't honest, you couldn't be honest.

"just a lot of thoughts on my mind." you mumbled out as your eyes slowly shut in an attempt to drift off to sleep.

you felt jaehee shifting under you, her delicate fingers moving from your hair to your shoulders to sit you up on the shared bed. when you opened your eyes with a small groan, you met the gaze of zen and jaehee. 

"you are aware that we are here for you, right?" jaehee's voice was soft, zen locked his phone and placed it on the bedside table so his attention was fully on you. his fingers danced against the skin of your cheek, wiping away a few tears you hadn't realized escaped your eyes.

"you were there for us through our hardest times, let us do the same for you." zen's voice was softer than you were used to, you could hear his heart breaking just from the sight of the tears against your skin.

and without any warning, the tears and words came pouring out like a tidal wave breaking glass. you were stumbling over your words, clumsy with your tongue as you tried to match your speech with the speed of your thoughts. you were being pulled in too many directions, the strings holding you together were finally collapsing and you could feel every heartbreak and hurt you've gone through covering the room with a thick cloud of gloom.

you had never been honest with the two before, not this honest. you had told them bits and pieces, saving them from the darkness that lingered in the corners of your minds in a selfish attempt to keep them close to you.

every joint and muscle in your body ached but felt so relieved getting the weight of your troubles off your mind and shoulders. strands of your hair were tucked behind your ear by a warm touch you instinctively knew was jaehee. her touch was softer and more delicate, the tips of her fingers calloused from years of sorting through files when she worked for jumin. zen's touch was colder and softer, his hands untouched by the office work with his manicured nails and flawless skin.

the silence between the three of you had your heart racing. this was it, this was the time they were finally going to leave you to be better off. how could they surround themselves with someone that constantly brought so much darkness along with them? how could they surround themselves with someone that couldn't bring them sunshine on a cloudy day. this was their chance to run and leave you as an empty hollow shell of a human being.

but they didn't.

instead, you felt the warm embrace of their arms around you, pulling you closer to them. close enough that your heartbeat slowed to sync with their own. jaehee was pressing kisses to your forehead, each one slowly overwhelming the thoughts bouncing in your mind and pushing them to the side. zen was softly singing under his breath into your ear, stopping only when he needed to pull you closer to his chest.

"sweetie, you are the light to our dark. you are the sunshine to our flower." zen trailed gentle and loving kisses from your jawline to your cheek, stopping when he could pull away and make sure he was watching you closely. "without you, there would be no us. without you, there would be no stars in our galaxies."

with every word of zen's that passed his lips and made its way into your heart, you felt the looming darkness over your head retreating into the horizon. even if it may be temporary, you knew zen and jaehee would be there the next time. and you would be there for them too. that's the thing with these ever changing cloudy days, they come and go like the tides of the ocean, and the most you can say is that with sticking around, this is you trying.

**Author's Note:**

> i am... not used to writing anything like this and having it be so short but i had a lot of muse for this and it was CUTE. anyways. i wrote the majority of this at like 4am so excuse me trying to be poetic and deep when i am, in fact, not.


End file.
